Happy myself!
Bajju, Februrary 2019
I was in my hut.
I had been in this strange thought process that I should go on a lonely voyage, cutting off from the world. I had started enjoying the loneliness too. I was not watching TV for a long time, not in touch with the print media and most importantly, I was not in touch with friends. I had stopped watching movies, as travelling to Bikaner was an affair. I had started enjoying rural travel. But things changed when I analysed my life.
All of a sudden, I realised that I was all alone in this world. That was scary. I was talking only to my parents once or twice a day, which I guess was good enough. I realised that I had colleagues at my work-place, but no friends. Suddenly, I was short of friends. All my friends were getting married or busy with their work.
It is here that I made friends with nature. I planted a tree right outside my hut. I named it 'PAED' (Hindi/ Urdu for a plant!) I started meditating and started writing my old friend, my diary.
This was the new exercise which was making me meditate and explore myself deeper. I had started reading more books. It is here that I was exploring new forms of music too, which was killing time.
I had no friends, but I was super busy. I had started spending time looking at the amazing stars. This was a big thing for me always, but suddenly, was bigger!
Then, I went back home and I thought I should get in touch with 'KAMAAN'. It was refreshing. I met some older NID friends too. That too was good. With all the decisions of meeting city people soon, I came back to Bajju.
This time, I was not lonely. This loneliness had made me think about myself. I time being alone, made me grasp a lot to teach.
I was full of new plans, new meetings, new plans, but I had started liking my loneliness.
It was just a content and happy myself!
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